Looking back over the year, I realized how much effort I put into a diet earlier in the year and how excited it was, it seemed like one I could stick to, until Rachel's birthday came along and I abandoned all hope after that. (Because I'm dumb.)
I realized why diets fail me so much. When my car looks awful, or I need to shave, or I get behind in the bills, I can quickly get caught up. Of course, each time I resolve to not get so shaggy, not let my car get so dirty, or to sign in to money more than twice a month. Even haircuts... my hair is too long right now, but this weekend I can go to Supercuts and everything will be set straight, my problem solved in less than 10 minutes.
Sadly, diets don't work that way and my problem with patience and lack of willpower make it difficult. Perhaps those are excuses, but they are also reality.
I'm gonna try to get back on the wagon, in small steps. No major radical change like Kevin's plans for the new year, but I'm gonna start small. I'm going to give all of the Reeses peanut butter cups that I got for Christmas to Lori. She really likes them a lot more than me, and if I give them to her, they're not going in my mouth.
In reality, I didn't do so poorly over the holidays. Don't get me wrong. I did horribly. But at the same time, I didn't really gain any new weight. I did the usual yo-yo to the exact same weight, though this time I did lose and gain more just to get back to the same spot. The worst part is we gave away the exercise bike, planning to buy a new one once we've moved.
So let's see what I can do with my poor willpower and lack of patience. If Seattle is a new start, let's see if I can get a jump on that in the next two months and actually have something (or less of something) to show for it by the time we move.
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