Sunday, January 21, 2024

120: Yellow

It had to have been on sale for a really good price, right? As much as he hated his neighbors, were they really the type of asshole who would buy a car that color? Why would anyone buy a car that color? It wasn't quite the color of a banana. It wasn't quite the color of mustard. It wasn't even the color of a yellow caution sign. It just lay there. An uninspired, ugly, boring annoying color. 

The bright color made one think of a toy, but this would be one of those toys that languished on the shelf, a depressing, uninspired color that drained the life from you just to look, improving with each layer of dust until it was shoved to the very back of the shelf and hidden behind a collection of stuffed animals. The stuffed animals hadn't been placed there. They'd just sort of migrated to that spot to hide that ugly toy.

And there it was, parked on the street, always in the corner of his peripheral vision.

How did it even come to be? In an era where car manufacturers only painted in blacks and grays and whites and dealers purchased an even more limited selection, who looked at a soiled diaper and thought "I want a color even less pleasing to the eye?"  Was there a mistake in the factory? Had the mixing machine had a failed software patch or a broken spray nozzle? Was this the winning bet in a "design a truly hideous paint color" contest?  Was the purchase itself even a part another bet?  Did someone win because the car sold at all?

Snapping his fingers he thought maybe he finally had it - perhaps his neighbors were colorblind. Yes, that must be it, he thought to himself. Perhaps they could only see in shades of gray. Perhaps the color was a nice gray, like battleship painted in eggshell with several clearcoats. That helped. Now he felt sorrow and pity for these pool colorblind neighbors and at the same time envy - they must have no idea how disgustingly banal their infectious ooze-colored car was.

Sill, he decided that was no consolation - the car would probably never be hit. Unless its color drove someone to madness, in typical everyday driving, it was more likely that anyone that looked it at would reflexively jerk the wheel away, causing the car to blissfully drive down the street leaving revulsion and collisions in its wake.

Monday, January 01, 2024

Happy Meh Year


I read somewhere that if this were the 1900s, I'd have reached the average lifespan for my gender and race. But I guess with advancements in science and medicine, now my age only puts me at 66% completion based on the current averages. I guess we're supposed to be grateful.  

So, I guess around we go again. 

I have this thing about thermostats.  I think they should only be set to numbers like 70, 72, 75, 78 or 80.  Any other numbers and you're just being too picky.  I guess if I apply that years as well then I suppose I should plan to be back here in another year making another post because 2024 is a non-number. Hopefully that means we can make it a bit of a quiet year.  I don't know if that's possible with the election coming up later this year, but I'm not running for office and my vote doesn't count, so what do I care?

I don't want to stand out, I don't want to make a name for myself, I don't want to make waves. I don't want any big changes. I really want this year to be meh. It feels like I get more and more tired so if we can just have a nice quiet non-year that's my goal. I'll read some books, lose some weight (hopefully) and see some home improvement projects completed (office fully drywalled and possibly ceilinged, a door professionally installed where we're missing one currently, a tree removed, pickets added to the front porch, maybe some furniture built), but yeah, I really want an unimpressive, quiet, under-the-radar year.

Here's to meh.

Sunday, July 09, 2023

Organizing my Gmail

 With a little bit of help from ChatGPT and trial-and-error, I have a script that helps me keep my Gmail accounts more organized.  

I have five labels:

**0**, **1**, **2**, **3** and **4**

What the script does:

For mail over 12 hours old, add label **0** and **1**

For mail over 30 days old, remove label **1** and add label **2**

For mail over 90 days old, remove label **2** and add label **3**

For mail over 1 year old, remove label **3** and add label **4**

For any mail that's read, flip it back to unread.

It runs every hour.  (Label **0** is a holdover from something else and it's less important.)


Anyhow, this allows new emails to come into my inbox and if I deal with them right away (that is, I delete them), then everything's good.  If it's not something I can handle right away, it moves out of the inbox.  

It means when I open my mail on my phone, it's never going to be overwhelming, it's just going to be the new stuff.  (I have other filters that move a lot of commercial/bulk mail out of the inbox right away because I don't need to be alerted about sales coupons.)


function processEmails() {
var threads = GmailApp.search("older_than:1y label:**3** -in:trash -in:sent -is:chat");

for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
thread.addLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**4**"));
thread.removeLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**3**"));
}

var threads = GmailApp.search("older_than:90d label:**2** -in:trash -in:sent -is:chat");

for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
thread.addLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**3**"));
thread.removeLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**2**"));
}

var threads = GmailApp.search("older_than:30d label:**1** -in:trash -in:sent -is:chat");

for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
thread.addLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**2**"));
thread.removeLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**1**"));
}

var threads = GmailApp.search("older_than:12h -label:**0** -in:trash -in:sent -is:chat ");

for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
thread.addLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**0**"));
thread.addLabel(GmailApp.getUserLabelByName("**1**"));
thread.moveToArchive();
}

var query = "is:read -in:trash -in:sent -is:chat"; // Replace with your desired query
var threads = GmailApp.search(query);
threads.forEach(function(thread) {
var messages = thread.getMessages();
messages.forEach(function(message) {
message.markUnread();
});
});


}



To use this script, follow these steps:
  1. Open your Gmail account in a web browser.
  2. Click on the gear icon in the top right corner and select "View all settings".
  3. Go to the "Advanced" tab.
  4. Scroll down to the "Desktop notifications" section and enable the "Allow external programmatic access to Gmail" option.
  5. Click "Save Changes" at the bottom of the page.
  6. Open the Google Apps Script editor by visiting https://script.google.com/.
  7. Create a new script file and replace the default content with the script provided above.
  8. Save the script and give it a name (e.g., "EmailProcessor").
  9. Click on the clock icon in the toolbar to set up a time-driven trigger.
  10. Configure the trigger to run the processEmails function at your desired interval (e.g., every hour, every day).
  11. Save the trigger and confirm any necessary permissions.
The script will now run automatically based on the trigger you set up and perform the specified actions on your Gmail messages. Make sure to review and adjust the script as needed before deploying it to your Gmail account.

Saturday, July 01, 2023

Evil Pastors

AN INCOMPLETE POST - MAY CONTAIN SPELLING ERRORS, INCOMPLETE/CONTRADICTORY THOUGHTS.

ORIGINALLY STARTED IN JULY 2017.  

WILL POST AUTOMATICALLY ON JULY 1, 2023 IF I DON'T DO ANYTHING OR IF I DIE BEFORE THEN.

A friend of mine recently posted this (An Open Latter to My Parents' Pastor, Carrie Surbaugh, 07/13/2017) on Facebook. Surbaugh came out last year as a lesbian after years of trying to deny it. She has been active in church her entire life and even recently preached at her church. Her parents have been very involved in their church. But now, after some very public condemnation from the pulpit, her parents feel that they must leave that church.

There was a smattering of comments in response to his post and I felt compelled to weigh in (when am I not?).  I wanted to later share it with Lori but couldn't find it and worried they'd deleted the entire post.  Finally found it a few days later.  Posting a version of it here.

This (Carrie's letter) is a sad letter. Nearly every church I have ever attended has demanded we take a "side" on the issue - either homosexuality is (a) a sin or (b) it is a sin and you're sinning for trying to say it isn't and you should leave because you're not being honest and you don't agree with us.

I'll be honest. For decades I've wrestled the whole notion of whether homosexuality was a personal choice or something someone had no control over, any more than they could choose (at birth) their parents, their gender or their race.  But it was only a theoretical question.

For a long time I was on the other "side" of this argument - for that's what it is - the church demands we take a "side" and then we are either welcome or unwelcome depending on the church. I believed homosexuality to be a sin.

We seize upon this "sin" (if it is one) and hold it up as separate, distinct, more grievous while we all continue in sins of our own. Confident in our salvation, quick to shame and condemn this one particular sin because it's one we ourselves can never see ourselves engaging in.

And that's not love. If you believe it is a sin and someone can be saved from a life of it (hush, I'm trying to make a point), we don't do that by casting them out into the darkness. We do it by showing the light and love of God and making a sinner decide "I want that life."

A person has to be pretty out of touch not to know that those who don't identify hetero struggle, often in silence.

To preach against this sin from the pulpit isn't a charge the "sinner" to repent, it's a wink and a nod to the rest of the congregation that it's ok to continue to be hard-hearted.

Saturday, April 15, 2023

The Adults Lied

The music should have been the first clue.  Ask anyone when the best music came out and most people will tell you of a time when they were in their teens. How can so many people think the music of their teens was the best music ever? 

Aren't we, as a collective, supposed to be getting smarter about knowing what people want? Shouldn't music be getting better every year?

The adults told us that things would get better as we got older. The promise was that we'd have more power, more authority, more autonomy, more spending power, more freedom. "Things get better," they said. Finish high school. Go to college. Start a career. Get married. Have kids. Buy a house. Own a brand new car that no one else has ever driven. Travel to interesting places.

I'm probably part of the last generation that it was very easy to mislead. We had nothing but their word to go on, so we followed the path the path they laid out for us. And by the time we realized it was all a lie, it was too late. Some things got better. Some times were better. But so much turned out to be a lie. Now as adults, it was our turn to lie to the kids.

Only... something happened. Social media happened. No longer did careers and family life take you out of the conversation, leaving only authority figures, religious figures, political figures and capitalist figures to do the talking. Now anyone could say "uh... yeah... no..." 

Things don't get better. The adults lied.

Thursday, April 06, 2023

Gmail Script

 function autoReply() {

var label = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('reject'); // Change 'reject' to the label name you want to use
var threads = label.getThreads();
for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
var messages = thread.getMessages();
for (var j = 0; j < messages.length; j++) {
var message = messages[j];
// Change the signature of the reply message as per your requirement
var replyBody = "Hi - thanks for contacting me about this opportunity. After review*, it does not appear to be fit.\n\nIf you'd like more specifics about why it's not a fit, please ask.\n\nThanks,\n______\n\n* Notes: If you've emailed me multiple times, you may receive multiple copies of this note. In some cases, the review is performed automatically without me even seeing the email based on certain words or phrases in your email. Also, please check your database. I may be replying from a different email address than the one you emailed. This is the correct one (__@gmail.com) for all recruiter communications.\n---\n+ Looking for an Email Marketing job? https://emailmktgjobs.blogspot.com/\n+ Connect with me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/___/\n+ Schedule a call: ___";

if (message.getFrom.getAddress === '_____@gmail.com' || message.getFrom.getAddress === '______@gmail.com') {
// Do nothing.
return;
}
GmailApp.sendEmail(message.getFrom(), 'Re: ' + message.getSubject(), replyBody);
thread.removeLabel(label);
thread.moveToTrash();
}
}

var label = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('_SHARE');
var removelabel1 = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('_WAITING');
var removelabel2 = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('LINKEDIN');

var threads = label.getThreads();
for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
var messages = thread.getMessages();
for (var j = 0; j < messages.length; j++) {
var message = messages[j];

thread.removeLabel(removelabel1);
thread.removeLabel(removelabel2);
GmailApp.moveThreadToArchive(thread);
GmailApp.markThreadUnread(thread);
}
}

var label = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('_WAITING');
var removelabel1 = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('LINKEDIN');

var threads = label.getThreads();
for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
var messages = thread.getMessages();
for (var j = 0; j < messages.length; j++) {
var message = messages[j];

thread.removeLabel(removelabel1);
GmailApp.moveThreadToArchive(thread);
GmailApp.markThreadUnread(thread);
}
}

var label = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('rate');
var addlabel = GmailApp.getUserLabelByName('_WAITING');
var threads = label.getThreads();
for (var i = 0; i < threads.length; i++) {
var thread = threads[i];
var messages = thread.getMessages();
for (var j = 0; j < messages.length; j++) {
var message = messages[j];
// Change the signature of the reply message as per your requirement
var replyBody = "Thanks for sharing this role. What's the budgeted compensation range?\n(Per California state law - see below - this should have been included in the original email.)\n\nThanks,\n______\n\nPay Transparency Laws: \n* The salary range must be posted -- even if the role is ultimately performed elsewhere -- if it *could* be performed in California, Colorado, Washington state as well as New York City; Westchester County, NY; Ithaca, NY and Jersey City, NJ. Also effective for New York State on 9/17/2023. Statewide laws are currently being considered in Massachusetts, South Carolina and Tennessee. \n* Recruiters must provide the salary range - if requested - if the candidate lives in Connecticut, Maryland or Rhode Island.\n* It is illegal to ask for someone's salary history if they live in California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Illinois, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Missouri, Nevada, New Jersey, New York State, Oregon, Puerto Rico, Rhode Island, Vermont and Washington state. Also Atlanta; Cincinnati; Columbia, SC; Louisville; New Orleans; Toledo; Philadelphia and Richland County, SC. Note: In Alabama, you can ask for it, but if you discriminate against a prospective candidate who refuses to provide, they can sue you.\n---\n+ Looking for an Email Marketing job? https://emailmktgjobs.blogspot.com/\n+ Connect with me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/_____/\n+ Schedule a call: https://calendly.com/____";
GmailApp.sendEmail(message.getFrom(), 'Re: ' + message.getSubject(), replyBody);
thread.removeLabel(label);
thread.addLabel(addlabel);
GmailApp.moveThreadToArchive(thread);
GmailApp.markThreadUnread(thread);
}
}

}

Friday, February 10, 2023

Extroverts and Introverts: Understanding the Differences and Working Effectively Together

It's no secret that people have different personalities, and this extends to the way they approach work and collaborate with others. While extroverts are often seen as outgoing and sociable, introverts are often perceived as reserved and introspective. When working together, it's important for extroverts to understand and respect these differences to build a more harmonious work environment. In this blog post, we'll explore how extroverts can change their approach when working with introverts to get the best results.

1. Respect Their Need for Alone Time

Introverts often need alone time to recharge their batteries and process information. They may retreat to a quiet corner, take a walk outside, or simply take a break from the constant stimulation of a noisy office environment. Extroverts can support their introverted colleagues by respecting their need for alone time and not taking it personally.

2. Be Considerate of Their Communication Style

Introverts tend to think before they speak, while extroverts are often more spontaneous and speak first, think later. When working with introverts, extroverts can make a conscious effort to listen and not interrupt. Additionally, introverts may prefer email or written communication to face-to-face meetings. Extroverts should be aware of this preference and make an effort to use the communication channels that work best for the introvert.

3. Allow Them to Contribute in Their Own Way

Introverts may not jump in to a conversation or meeting as readily as extroverts. However, this doesn't mean they don't have valuable contributions to make. By allowing introverts to contribute in their own way, such as through written comments or a more reserved approach to a group discussion, extroverts can ensure that the introvert's ideas and perspectives are taken into account.

4. Provide a Comfortable Work Environment

Introverts may feel overwhelmed in a highly social and noisy work environment. Extroverts can help create a more comfortable work environment for introverts by reducing noise levels, encouraging quiet spaces, and promoting an environment where introverts feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and ideas.

5. Encourage Them to Step Out of Their Comfort Zone

While it's important to respect an introvert's natural tendencies, extroverts can also encourage introverts to step out of their comfort zone and participate in team building activities or social events. This can help introverts develop new skills and build stronger relationships with their colleagues.

In conclusion, working with introverts can be a valuable and enriching experience for extroverts. By respecting their differences, being considerate of their communication style, allowing them to contribute in their own way, providing a comfortable work environment, and encouraging them to step out of their comfort zone, extroverts can help create a more harmonious and productive work environment for everyone.

Written by an AI