#7 - I Should Have Turned Left #blogaday

If I were to say I had no regrets, I'd be lying, clueless or living an unexamined life. But... are there things I regret that I could have actively changed? Without hindsight or retrospect... is there a point where I had the decision right in front of me and I zigged when I should have zagged? Something I really, truly regret?  Something that changed my life?

There's not a lot. How is that possible?  I feel like a lot of what's happened in my life has happened to me, not necessarily things I've directly controlled, or things I influenced but happened over time. Frankly, I've been quite lucky - I've been blessed. But flip a coin moment... turn left or turn right?

Two things come to mind.  The first was after an unfortunate night of excessive alcohol consumption. I told a friend that I didn't want to speak to them for three months. I watched the calendar and when three months hit, I held my breath. The days ticked by with no contact. Close to four months, they tentatively contacted me. So, first off, I had misremembered what I'd told them - I'd told them four months not three. We've reconnected and they didn't hold it against me.  So, really stupid move I really regret, but it didn't change my life. (Except resolved not to do that again - the extensive drinking or treating my friends like that.)

Oh, Mad TV... if only I'd been paying attention.

The other thing... pure stupidity. Shortly after moving to California (the first time), I signed up with one of those dating firms. Way before internet, those ones that they always mock - you record a video, they have a big library of video tapes and binders of photos and bios. I hadn't dated a lot and now I was in a new city and didn't know anyone and thought that I needed to take matters into my own hands. I hadn't dated a lot in my life, but all had been quite awesome and all had occurred when I wasn't looking. Love found me. But now I was going to take control? Or I was going to get some company help me?

First off, it was a scam. When you first go in there they go and grab some binders and bring them back to show you the kinds of people meet what you're looking for. What you don't realize is that people can take themselves "off market" - a little slip of paper gets added to the binder.  So when they bring the binders out for you to look at, they quickly slip out the pieces of paper. Everyone they showed me when I signed up was all "off market" when I came back later to look through the binders.

Secondly, they don't care once they have your money. They don't really tell you if your video is good or not and if you suck at things like talking on the phone, even if you do find some connections, they might not call back.

Third, they know that much like joining a gym, you'll lose motivation quick. Who wants to keep going back to that place and looking through binders full of non-matches. (This was before the internet and search engines and relational/relationship databases.)  Unlike a gym which keeps sucking out of your checking account month after month, they get it all up front.

And so that's the regret.

Not that I used a dating company, not that it didn't work (I'm so glad it didn't), it was that when I signed up for that stupid thing, I went into debt. It was the first time I put more on a credit card that I could pay off at the end of the month (actually, split it onto two cards because all my cards have what now would be considered laughably low credit limits). And once I was paying less than the full amount, a line had been crossed.

I was still in debt when I got married and it wasn't until we sold a house at the top of the market (that my parents had helped us buy) that we broke the cycle. Unfortunately, unanticipated events caused us to go into debt once more after that, but I'm glad to say that now we have once again put a stop to it and we think we now understand the signs and how to avoid getting into consumer debt again.

And we know how good it feels to not be in debt.

Full Disclosure: Some stuff came up this weekend and this was posted a day late. Same with #8. Will get back on track shortly.

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Blogaday 2017 (what is blogaday?)

• #1 - Not My Resolution
• #2 - Walking on Sunshine
• #3 - Vacation I've Never Taken
• #4 - It's a Thing
• #5 - My Favorite Selfie
• #6 - Leftovers

Tomorrow: #8 - Bacon and Eggs

#6 - Leftovers #blogaday

When we moved to a smaller house, we downsized quite a bit. But six months in, we haven't fully unpacked. Maybe you never really do.

The VCRs didn't make the move (one sacrificed to "Camp Invention", the other off to Goodwill) and the VHS tapes that for some reason did make it to California moved to a box for Goodwill.

But earlier this week in a round of unpacking, a cache of DVDs were uncovered. There was some we don't really watch, some studio screeners we maybe watched once, some we no longered cared for, some that actually didn't exist (don't let anyone tell you there were sequels to  The Matrix - if they try to tell you that you just tell them that they're filthy liars and to get out of your car. If you're feeling magnanimous, pull to the curb and slow or stop even.)

So quite a few were a no brainer.  But what of Futurama? I've gone back and forth on those. I've been watching them amongst other things (on Netflix) but DVDs?

"Toss them, I can watch them on Netflix."
"Keep them, they might not always be on Netflix."
"Toss them, there's plenty of other stuff that I've never seen before on Netflix."
"Keep them, there's DVD commentary."
"Toss them, do I really want to hear any more commentary for the people responsible for Seymour's fate?"

In the end, I decided I will donate (toss) them - it's much easier to find a device that plays Netflix (or Hulu Plus or Amazon Prime Video or Acorn or YouTube) than it is to find a device that plays DVDs.

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Blogaday 2017 (what is blogaday?)

• #1 - Not My Resolution
• #2 - Walking on Sunshine
• #3 - Vacation I've Never Taken
• #4 - It's a Thing
• #5 - My Favorite Selfie

Tomorrow: #7 - I Should Have Turned Left

Free Idea for @Amazon or @Walmart or @Target

Right up front: I offer this idea up to anyone who wants it with no strings attached. (Though credit or a gift card would be nice if you do this and it makes you a ton of money.)

How do you get shoppers to buy on-list (and from your store) when the Baby Registry, Wedding Registry or Wish List is full of higher-priced items?

From time to time, you might encounter a Wish List with items that are just too rich for you. You want to get them a gift you know they'll like, but everything on their list is outside of your price range.

And it's not like you think they're being unreasonable... after all, you have good tastes yourself. A gift card doesn't feel like you put a lot of effort into your gift giving, but looking at that China Gravy Boat that matches their place-settings, the elaborate Stroller that will protect their baby from hurricane-force winds or the Alexa-enabled Universal Remote with Hub for the techie who's just moved to a small house - buying any one of those alone just seems like an overgift.

If you knew who else was invited to the Wedding or Baby Shower, or if you wanted to connect with a bunch of family members before the Birthday, maybe you could do a group gift. But you might not know people - and it's a lot of work, coordinating, collecting and trying not to judge the miser who feels compelled to participate but only throws in a few bucks but writes three paragraphs in the card.

And this is where technology can help.  Presenting Go-In-On.  You specify the dollar amount that you want to put towards a gift and you enter in a note. Others can see what's been pledged and add their own gift. Now, suddenly anyone can help buy that special gift.

Once the first gift is pledged, the clock starts ticking. Other Wish List visitors then have 30 days to fulfill the rest of the cost.  Once the total is met, the item ships along with the well-wishes of everyone who chipped in for the gift.

At the end of 30 days, if the total isn't met, the recipient receives a gift card along with an explanation that everyone pitched in towards the item. The gift card, of course, can be used for anything in the store, but maybe there's a brief discount to encourage the purchaser to buy the original item.  

#5 - My Favorite Selfie #blogaday

I looked through all my past Facebook profile pictures because there's where most of my selfies end up and this one made me laugh so hard.  There's a couple where Ben's being a little more gentle but I love that I captured this one where I'm getting one of his big wet sloppy kisses. Goofy boy.  And before you say "That's not a selfie - where's your abnormally long arm holding the camera?"  Oh, no, my friend... I was doing selfies back before they were called that.  That's right, digital camera on a timer mounted a on tripod, that's how we did it in the old days, I tell you whut.

I get to put extras because the rule of "blogaday" is that you get to do whatever you want, using the topic as just a jumping off point.  So here's *three* more.  Just deal with it.

This was taken at Dash Point City Park in Tacoma, a really cool park that I enjoyed going to. It was a bit of a blustery day (aren't they all) and Rachel was there to ride the swings. She's wearing the PLU hat we had gotten at a recent visit to PLU, I'm wearing my ExactTarget "Subscribers Rule" hat, and that great green jacket that finally wore out and didn't come with us to California. That jacket makes me think fondly of World Vision - it's what I wore on my many lunchbreak walks through the fabulous forests on and around its campus.

I had to include this one. It's slightly unsettling to me because I rarely recognize the face in the photo and it's mine. Between the dark background and then angle and the fact that I was my lowest weight here, I feel it looks odd - not to mention my really long haircut.  However, it also looks good - because of my weight loss and because I used several techniques you're supposed to use to get a good photo, including moving your head forward slightly and turning your head enough to make sure that your jaw line is visible.  Hard to get all those things just right while you're also holding the phone and trying to take your own photo, but I captured it.

And finally, a selfie that I didn't take. But it's not a selfie of me. Though, OK, I am in the photo. I had photos with the kids, I wanted a photo of my wife.  Turns out most of her profile pics are professional shots or photos I took across the table of her on one of our date nights.  So, here's one she took.  I think it was because whenever we posted photos from date night and there was just one of us in the photo one of our friends would beg for a shot of the two of us.  (Yes, you know who you are. Hi and thanks for reading.) So I think by the expressions here that this must have been taken just for her.

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Blogaday 2017 (what is blogaday?)

• #1 - Not My Resolution
• #2 - Walking on Sunshine
• #3 - Vacation I've Never Taken
• #4 - It's a Thing

Tomorrow: #6 - Leftovers

Brilliant #Email from @Facebook

I've been taking a Facebook vacation this week... I only go on Facebook to interact with people who have sent me Facebook Messenger messages and to post for one of the companies I work with. (Sorry, not the video game company.)  Otherwise, I ignore the little red notification circle. Last night it said 49. Oddly, the app on my phone says 30.  I figure next Sunday I'll make a brief appearance, get caught up and then consider another vacation. It's been nice and quiet without Facebook.

Facebook has noticed my overall absence as it just sent me an email trying to get me to show my face. While I'm not going to click on it, I do want to spend a little time writing about how brilliant it is. The email marketer in me geeked out a little bit when I discovered what they're doing.

So check-it... subject mentions a friend by name and then shows a little bit of what looks like something they would have said.  (I had seen the full subject earlier on my desktop and it said "[Friend] and others have updated their statuses.)

So, naturally, I'm curious... what would we have been proud that my friend did?  So I opened the email.  But the actual status is nowhere to be found. I'm using Inbox by Gmail which is notorious at rendering emails wrong, so I wasn't sure... was it a mistake that I couldn't find the status update, or was it a ploy to get me to click through.

So I looked at the source - sure enough - hidden, white-on-white 1 pixel text in a 1 pixel tall table cell with css styling to hide. They were definitely not wanting you to see this in the email.  Brilliant!!!

#4 - It's a Thing #blogaday

I don't know what to write for this one.

So, still thinking about what I wrote yesterday, here's an original piece of art I call "Stained Glass Paris" for lack of a better name.

I experimented with Google Translate to try to come up with a different name, but I couldn't find one I liked, so we'll stick with this one.  Simple, straightforward.  This was kind of fun. I could see doing it again, but limiting myself to a particular set of colors, or trying to be more intentional in my placement - when you step back and look at the whole, certain lines bisect the piece and it would be interesting to radiate out lighter or darker shades from those lines.

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Blogaday 2017 (what is blogaday?)

• #1 - Not My Resolution
• #2 - Walking on Sunshine
• #3 - Vacation I've Never Taken

Tomorrow: #5 - My Favorite Selfie

#3 - Vacation I've Never Taken #blogaday

Part of me regrets not having traveled more. Before I was married, before we had children, when we only had one child, before we moved from Seattle, etc. But if I'm being honest, I somewhat dread traveling.



While I'm fascinated to scroll through Google Maps or watch drone videos, it's more detached and you get to see the highlights without all of that travel. Traveling can be tough. Long flights in tiny seats, lots of walking, looking at stuff (like museums or old buildings) that people say is important without having enough context to really appreciate why it's important, or with the kids, making sure that we're aware of where exits are and where we are on the meltdown threat index.

I enjoyed Victoria, BC - you could get there with some driving and a boat and then you had your own car with you on the other side. I enjoyed being a tourist in Seattle. And I enjoy the day trips we take now, but there's always been a little bit of regret that I haven't been to Sydney, Paris, Berlin or London and that it's been a long time since I've been to Maui.

But part of me imagines Ireland. Not the touristy big city, but a rental at the end of a long rutted road outside a small village. Going into the village to shop or for a pint, getting to know the locals. It's probably more of a solo imagining where I'm just the quiet foreigner who people think might be an author or something. And if not Ireland, then at least an arrondissement way outside of the tourist sector when the weather is nice and we can wake up, sit on a little patio with gauzy curtains swaying in the breeze, or perhaps pop down to a little cafe for a petit repas before a very leisurely day. And that's more of a couples imagining than a whole family thing. But if I were to think about what these both have in common is that they're not rushed. There isn't some need to get it all in because time is limited. If I'm going to spend hours on a plane, I'm owed enough time between flights to get acclimated (when Alaska Airlines is sending me a popup reminding me the webcheck for the flight home while I'm still checking into the hotel... that sucks), that it needs to be a retreat away from everything else, long enough for it to be home for awhile.

I do hope to get everyone on board a plane for Hawaii at some point, but that does seem like a long trip for Ben.

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Blogaday 2017 (what is blogaday?)

• #1 - Not My Resolution
• #2 - Walking on Sunshine

Tomorrow: #4 - It's a Thing