Recent Reads

Some stuff I've read recently... these are Amazon links, you can buy the books and I'll get a few pennies in the process. (I used to say you were funding my coffee, but really, you're helping to buy me more books. If it's coffee, check out Drink Trade - and get a free bag of coffee!) 

Space Team (Volumes 1-12) by Barry J. Hutchison

These are popcorn books for science fiction fans.  I found myself devouring them at the start and then reading less and less as I got closer to the end, not wanting it to end. Incarcerated for identity theft, due to a case of mistaken identity, Cal Carver ironically is abducted from his cell by aliens. Up until that point, no one knew there was anyone else in the galaxy besides humans. Still processing this, Cal learns he's the last remaining human due to another clerical error. And thus begins twelve volumes of adventures, escapades, romps and capers across a galaxy filled with all kinds of interesting people, some of whom are nice. There are good books, not-as-good books, a few odd shifts in the "universe," some embarrassing titles and a good time I was sorry to see end. A satisfying set of stories with many, many laugh-out-loud moments.

Not One of Us by Debbie Herbert 

Years ago, high school girl's boyfriend and parents vanish. She finishes school, moves to the big city and starts her life. But now, she's back in the small town because her autistic brother's caregiver (her grandma) may no longer be able to care for her. Oh, and she has synesthesia -  she can see sounds. You learn this at the beginning and I really can't help you if it's not immediately obvious that this will come into play. The disappearance of that family isn't the only secrets the town holds and soon people start dying. And anyone and everyone is suspect. The protagonist is a middle-aged Matilda surrounded by cops whose lack of proper procedure (compared to what we see on TV) is astounding and, well, it's all just a mess. Halfway through the book we find out what happened to the family and you'd think it would have been a bigger deal, but it wasn't. 

A Deadly Influence (Abby Mullen #1) by Mike Omer

I liked Detective Abby Mullen. I didn't like most of the other characters in this book. You know how some stories constantly throw plot twists at you? I kept waiting for the plot twists here and they never came. Maybe some characters didn't play exactly the part I was suspecting, but apparently the detective was a superb judge of character. An interesting, modern idea overall, but I didn't much care for it.  I think I would give book two a try, though, since none of the prominent characters in this book would be back for a second call, as near as I can tell.

Abrupt, Unanticipated Destinations

I saw an old couch on the side of the road yesterday and it sparked a new thought in my head.  

I realized the couch had reached its destination, but that its utility had been in the journey. I finally understood, kind of, that saying about the journey being more important than the destination, or however the saying goes.

I've always hated the saying. For me, destination equalled something I wanted, something I was looking forward to.  The journey was torture, the waiting, the anticipation (and the possibility that the destination may not be a good enough payoff for the journey). I tended to take "journey" quite literally like family road trips, or junior high, high school and college -- times where I always felt I was "waiting for my real life to begin."

But I realized I had that same mentality when it came to work. I tend to leave jobs on other people's terms. There was one place where I thought I would work there until I retired. Once a year we'd have our service awards and someone who had been there 25, 30, 35 years would get up and give a speech.  I was amazed and how much they gave given towards the success of the organization and I imagined myself one day up there on stage giving a speech myself. But after eight years, they'd had enough of me and kicked me to the curb. In retrospect, that was good as my wife said I was probably clinically depressed for my last two years there and some pretty phenomenal things have happened since then. 

But this isn't about that, this is about me sitting on the curb, used up, discarded, told I was no longer valuable to the organization I had given eight years of my life to. I had quit my job, moved our family 1,100 miles to a new state because I thought God had told me, and then thought my employment with this organization (a Christian non-profit) was confirmation that I was following God's direction.  It's entirely possible that this was true at the time. (Moving my family back 1,100 miles since then has been great, but again, not about that.)

Because sitting on the curb (or rather, sitting in Costco getting a new cell phone since I had turned in my company-issued phone earlier that day), I questioned what was the point of it all. I couldn't see the journey, the contributions, how I had been instrumental for a time, perhaps what the organization needed, possibly even some aspects of my work living on after my departure, all I could see was -- as they say on American Idol -- I had come to the end of my journey. 

And the destination seemed pretty crappy.

But when I looked at the couch yesterday, I realized that it wasn't a bad investment because it was being thrown out, that it had been desired, specially chosen, and then served dutifully for who knows how long, through scary movies, exciting video games, distressing breaking news.  It may have been enjoyed by kids or pets or served as a temporary home for someone. It might have seen multiple homes. For that couch, it was definitely all about the journey and not the destination.

If life is a journey, there's quite a bit that's not so fun about our current journey, I find myself not so much wishing for my final destination, but knowing whenever it comes, it's going to be heartbreaking (and cruel) for those I leave behind. Not because I'm going to exit in a cruel way but because I'm responsible for people who will never be able to take care of themselves, one of whom won't understand why I'm no longer around.

So this whole journey/destination thing applied to my life is still a struggle for me to make sense of, but I think I can now better understand how to handle sudden destinations not of my choosing.